One Thing Right Chapter 16 | Wenrene

 One Thing Right

Chapter 16

"Control" 

After Wendy's scheduled therapy, Wendy and Irene decided to take a stroll for the night after they got home. Irene brought up how an evening stroll outside helps her calm her nerves and forget her worries and get herself a good night sleep later on. She mentioned that it's also a short but great time to spend time with oneself, to be in tune with herself after a long busy day. 

Wendy had second thoughts before agreeing to Irene since she was already dead tired in the head. Rose did not really asked so many questions to her during the therapy session but coming out with responses wasn't really easy as it should because even in just one question, her head usually formulates a lot of responses that she didn't know which of which was the right thing to tell. Wendy has brought up this difficulty to Rose on their second meeting and the professional told her that there aren't right or wrong so she must not worry and only asked of her to be honest with herself. Wendy then just nodded even though she didn't really understood what she meant. The first thing that came to mind was how will she do that if she wasn't really in tune with herself in her entire existence. What she only knew was to conform to whatever other people asked her to do, be it at home, at work or wherever regardless of what she thought or felt about it. 

Irene must have sensed the inner turmoil with her silence so she held her hand to snap her out of her reverie. Wendy looked at her surprised and when she saw the concern from Irene's face, she quickly wore a smile to hide herself out of habit and that's how Wendy agreed to Irene's request.

As they walked the through the park near their place, there was only silence. Wendy was spending her time inside her mind while Irene was walking by her side. When they reached the playground where the swing was located, that's when Irene tugged Wendy's shirt to get her attention. 

"Let's go to the swing." She invited and Wendy only smiled, again.

Irene happily played with the swing like a little child while Wendy couldn't find any strength to use her legs to swing as enthusiastically as her, so she remained there sitting only and watch her girlfriend enjoy everything. Wendy couldn't help but smile as it dawned to her where they were at the moment. It was the place wherein Irene took all the courage she has to confess to her. Up until now, that event was surreal to her, to have someone like Irene loving someone like... her. 

When Irene told her about how she knew about her depression even before she told her about it, Wendy felt a bit offended because it was something that shouldn't be told by anyone in her stead. It's was her weakness after all, a vulnerability that she wanted to supress from everyone. But in the end, she only let it slide especially when Irene brought up about losing her sister to depression. However, the problem has not ended because she chose to be silent about it, in fact, it only grew inside her head as day passed by. Wendy made it a goal to see herself with the way Irene sees her but with what she learned about the secret between Joy and Irene, she conluded that it must have been nothing but pity for her. Perhaps she only sees her as her sister who suffers from the same depression.

"Wendy?"  

She got startled at the sudden call and her one problem earlier quickly escalated into a much bigger problem as insecurities started to eat her on the inside. "Hmm?" She smiled, still.

Irene abruptly stopped swinging as she hits the ground and the smile on her face vanished upon witnessing her girlfriend's stature at that very time. Wendy was cracking a smile to tell everything was fine but her eyes and her body says otherwise. Of course, when Wendy agreed to their deal of telling everything to each other, Irene knew this wasn't the easiest thing to do especially for Wendy who was so used to concealing her real emotions.

"What are you thinking?" She asked and Wendy look at her as if she wanted to say something but couldn't so she added, "We promised to say everything to each other, right?" She reminded cautiously.

"If I tell you, would you leave me alone?" 

Irene was confused because even if it was raised as a question, it also sounded like a demand from her.

"Tell me your worries, include why you want me to leave you alone too. After that, I'll decide."  She said without hesitance and it seemed like Wendy already expected her response. 

Wendy sighed deeply before she speaks, "It seems like, I already saw it... how you see me." 

Irene grew even more curious now that she heard her. Wendy had stated before about that goal of hers before they got together as a couple, but she didn't expect that it was the thing that bothered her lately. Somehow, she's getting a grip of the situation, where Wendy was really coming from. 

"And how do I see you?"  She asked.

"Y-you only see me like your sister."

Irene was a bit taken aback with how her late sister got called out but that didn't stop her to make it clear for Wendy how she really felt about her, again. So she quickly sealed the gap between them with a kiss and slowly deepens it until they gasps both for air.

"I don't kiss my sister like this, do you?" Irene smiled reassuringly at Wendy whose face fully flushed. Satisfied with how she made Wendy breathless with a kiss, Irene smirked. "I could do more than that if you'll allow me." 

"W-what are you talking about?" Wendy felt embarrassed, what was she even thinking.

"I'm just responding to your question, this is how I truly see you. It's the benefit of telling me about it because at the end of the day, no matter how much you stress about it, your thoughts won't talk for me but I could do that for you."  

"You must be thinking I was so stupid for thinking like that, right?" 

Irene once again brought their lips together but this time it was only a peck before saying, "Why are you assuming so many things about me when you could ask me directly for answers? I told you, only I can tell you what I think and what I feel. That goes the same for you, if I want to know something from you, I'll ask it straight from you. In that way, I won't create delusions about you that only I made up inside my head. It would only hurt me and you, and I don't want that in the end. Besides, I'm more in love and interested about you than what's only inside my head so I'd rather ask you to know the real truth."  

Shonlomon | Wenrene

"I'm home~" Seungwan happily announced as she entered the dorm. The energy she got from the fun-filled last fan call event and an IG live comeback continuously made her ecstatic throughout the night. However, this energy was making her oblivious of the darkening aura slowly wrapping the whole place she just entered. The silent welcome from the last 2 remaining members she shared the dorm with was shrugged off and unsuspiciously went straight to the kitchen to prepare her meal for the night. After all, Joohyun and Sooyoung were all booked and busy with their own 'secret' schedules.

Speaking of Joohyun, Seungwan's feeling the chills now when she finally realized that she hasn't received any message from her the entire time and that's the time when fear came over her. She stopped whatever she was setting on her plate and search for her phone on whichever pocket she put it in that she forgotten due to current panic.

"Oh, there you are!" Seungwan said when she noticed her phone on the table that was in front of her while she stupidly rummage her clothes' pockets for that god damn phone. "What have I been doing?" She said to herself as she claimed her phone, embarrassed with her own actions.

The embarrassment was quickly replaced by heart stopping moment when Joohyun spoke. She didn't realize that her girlfriend already entered the kitchen with her.

"I've been thinking the same thing but I can't find an answer either." Joohyun said as she went straight to the fridge and took a bottle of water to drink. Seungwan has great tolerance towards a cold weather but she was never with Joohyun's cold treatment. By this time, Joohyun should have welcomed her with a warm hug and non stop kisses but water was more important to her now. Yes, Like Water, Joohyun loved every songs on the album, talked everyday how much she loved her voice and even every petals on her limited edition. But now, the literal water was her now first choice. For the first time, Seungwan cursed the water... mentally.

In The Hopes Of Coming Across You | Wenrene

"You look terrible, Seungwan. You should've not reported to work today." Seulgi, Seungwan's best friend and colleague said as she observes her friend spacing out in front of her computer. "I don't think you'll finish anything just by staring at your screen." She added and took Seungwan's pile of documents and started typing it on her own computer. 

The fast tapping sounds of the keyboards finally got through Seungwan's senses, her friend Seulgi has once again became a keyboard warrior saving her from a piled up work. They both work as chief editors in a small publishing company and since both of them don't have enough people under them, some raw works from their bosses were dropped directly on their table and never left. Seungwan and Seulgi were tired of the lack of support but they still endure it because they don't want to suffocate their people with more tasks as they already have more than enough on their plate.

To work on the extra loads equally were both agreed and planned by Seungwan and Seulgi, however, it wasn't the case at all for the past few days, weeks, months and a year. Seulgi was the only one doing most of the work as Seungwan's mind flies somewhere else. Seungwan felt bad about it and told Seulgi that she'll just resign and take some time off but the latter strongly disagreed with her decision and made her stay by her side in the end. Seulgi was very adamant that she'll help out no matter what and that Seungwan just have to continue doing work on her own pace and she'll do the rest for her. Seungwan was trying, for Seulgi, she was trying to function normally because she didn't want to see her cry immensely for her just like before. So she stayed, for Seulgi, her best friend who cares the most about her today.

"Stop staring at me Seungwan. I'd rather want you to stare at your own computer screen than stare at me typing like a mad woman here."

"When did you grow eyes on the side?" Seungwan joked but she's honestly always moved by Seulgi's sacrifices for her. Sometimes, she asks herself what she did in her past life to deserve a friend like Seulgi in this lifetime. They just understood each other deeply, how they were wired differently. They know each other like they were a part of each other's soul, an important piece that completes their whole being. 

"I know I've said this several times already, Seulgi, but I'm sorry."

Seulgi, as she had always done before whenever Seungwan's feeling less, stopped whatever she was doing and looked at her friend. "I told you several times too, that if I feel burdened I will inform you but I really don't. You just have to accept that fact because that's what friends are for. If you really feel bad about me helping you then return this favor by you just breathing each day, that's already enough for me." 

Seungwan's eyes starts to moisten as Seulgi gazes at her like she's looking at a flower that blooms not in the season of spring but of winter. To Seulgi, Seungwan is a miracle and this feeling is mutual between them. 

"I've said this multiple times to you too, it's because it's you that I don't feel burdened at all." 

The best friends looked at each other sincerely in silence. They have exchanged words of encouragement and love to each other that never fails to send warmth to their hearts, and it never failed to crack a smile on their faces too because after feeling the warmth of their words and gazes the chills of embarrassment also comes next with it. They just couldn't stand being too cheesy for long. 

"Aish! You're doing this on purpose, making me tell those cringeworthy words to you." Seulgi said with face flushed as she rubs her arms with both of her hands to get rid of the chills that her cheesiness gave.

Seungwan started doing the same and they both laughed at each other.

"I'll be leaving." Seungwan said and Seulgi's smile got wiped away instantly on her face. They were sinking back to the seriousness of the situation. Even if Seulgi already knew that it was coming, she refuses to believe that she has to let go of her best friend to find herself and face the battle that only her could solve.

"You'll call me, right?"

"Of course."

"Don't you want me to come with you?"

Seungwan smiled. "I think I have to do this on my own."

Seulgi sighed but she understood where Seungwan was coming from. "I'll wait for your comeback then. If something goes wrong along the way, you have to call me, okay?" She demanded instead of a request.

"Thanks, Seulgi-ah. Really, thank you."

It's been a year, ever since Seungwan fought for her life but quickly regretted as she was welcomed with only emptiness, exactly like those plain white walls that surrounded her when she woke up on a hospital bed. Since then, Seulgi watched how Seungwan survived each day but actually never lived.

Picking up her things at home after work, she has begun her journey in facing what she fears. A risky move without a plan nor a map to direct her where she's supposed to go. Opening the side window of the driver's seat, Seungwan became one with the wind that a spring night brings. She let her worries and  fear of the unknown fly by with the wind and focuses on the most important thing which was the present.

Seungwan continued on with her journey. She preferred to travel the roads at night because this way, she could fully relate to the emptiness that the darkness brings, it defines what she truly feels. She made sure she drives in silence too, just the sound of the car's engine and her breathing were the ones accompanying her through the night. 

The road, the landscapes, the grey walls of the tunnels and the towering trees after it...all the memories they bring will all stay hidden and be left in the dark.

Birthday Dinner | Wenrene

"Joohyun unnie, what gift would you want for your birthday today?" Seungwan said while she gets ready for her schedule. She's been busy with her Like Water/ solo debut preparations. 

"Aside from your heartfelt letter, flowers and chocolates?" Joohyun said while she watches Seungwan dress up. 

"Mmmm.. Yup!" 

"Nothing." 

"E-eh? Nothing?" She reacted while having a hard time buttoning her outfit. It was an easy task but her nervousness prevented her to function normally. Aside from being nervous because she has a new schedule today, Joohyun's watchful eyes contributed to her tension.

Seungwan went home late in the dorm last night, a schedule she mistakenly informed Joohyun about. Seungwan thought she'll come home early that night so she and Joohyun made plans to have dinner. When Seungwan's manager showed the schedule again to her during the day, she almost choke on her drink when she saw that she made a mistake. A grave mistake.

She felt bad because Joohyun looked forward to it so much. Joohyun was ecstatic about it because it's their alone time together after working so hard from their own solo activities. Even though they live in the same dorm, their schedule just don't match up lately at all. So in the end Joohyun got disappointed and that's one of the detestable happenings that Seungwan wanted to avoid but couldn't in their relationship.

But that's not the main reason why Seungwan was tensed lately before her girlfriend. Joohyun had been very understanding how important work, most especially her solo debut to her career. So, Joohyun forgave her right away.

The reason was, Seungwan was guilty over something that she did just recently. She realized it late but she did something that she knew Joohyun would be mad about. She didn't do it purposely though... it's her problem with herself too, being naturally... greasy.

Joohyun may not be active on instagram but she's a real human form of a surveillance camera. Wendy didn't know how but even when they were unable to spend much time together lately, Joohyun always knew everything she does even those details she missed out telling. It didn't creeped out Seungwan of course, because from the very beginning she knew all along how Joohyun was a bit... possessive of her. She easily gets jealous at times to which Seungwan always found so... cute. 

Yes, Joohyun already found out about her meeting up with Sejeong on her own special day. Joohyun didn't spoke a word upfront to her about it but she specifically gave out clues that she's aware. Like how she always clings to her whenever she comes home. How she gives out lovely kisses even in front of other members who all feigned gagging whenever it happens. She also takes a lot of pictures together while doing couple poses and tried to post on Instagram but ended up saving to drafts. All of these were enough clues that Joohyun found out something that she didn't like. Something that provoked her to unleash the jealous and possessive beast out of her natural tsundere form and Seungwan knew what it was. 

One Thing Right Chapter 15 | Wenrene

One Thing Right

Chapter 15

"Uncertain" 

Irene was already in her 3rd month of pregnancy (8th week now) to which her doctor Taeyeon advised to take extra precautions since trimesters were always the risky stage. Her prenatal check up started on her 6th week, accompanied by Seulgi first and later by Wendy, Taeyeon recommended her to keep her lifestyle on check. Stay away from stress as much as possible, eat healthy, exercise and sleep right. With that, Taeyeon advised her to do not overwork herself. 

Irene assured Taeyeon that she already informed her agency and now only finishing some schedule set before. With that, Taeyeon approved and everyone was relieved especially Wendy. Also, her baby bump was already starting to grow obviously so it'll be better to take a leave the soonest before people start noticing. That soonest was first declined by Irene's agency though, only 2 weeks prior notice for a year break was a shocker to everyone. Thankfully, her manager who was very close to their bosses pleaded on her behalf without probing too much. The only reason Irene gave them was that she wanted to go back studying when in fact she has no plans at all. It was a thought only to reason out. She just wanted to protect her child's privacy above all. She'll just vanish from the limelight without notice for the public. 

On the good and lighter side of things, Wendy who she adores so much everyday was making her world a better place to live. Ever since their heart-to-heart session about opening to each other a week ago, her heart just kept melting. She's in pure bliss hearing the beauty of Wendy's mind. Her worries, her perspective of the world and her thoughts and feelings about her. She has the idea of how hard it was for Wendy to disclose everything but she was serious about making efforts for her so she did it bit by bit. Irene was truly moved and cherish every seconds with Wendy in her heart. 

When Irene informed her that it'll be her last week of work this week, Wendy didn't hesitate to offer accompanying her every morning to go to her workplace and fetch her at night. Wendy didn't take a no for an answer so Irene gave in. Irene told Wendy not to force herself though if she doesn't feel like doing anything and that she'll be fine, but the latter didn't budge and continue with her plans.

Monday (Irene's last week at work)

Wendy was standing by Irene's unit door early in the morning. Irene got startled and even squeaked in fear the moment she opened her door. Irene had thought that Wendy already had forgotten since she didn't receive a message from her and that was fine with her really. She wants Wendy to take all the rest she needed after all. But Wendy was always true to her words. 

"Wendy. You scared me. Stop laughing!" She hits Wendy with her hand who was chuckling at her reaction, but she also didn't waste any time to give her a good morning kiss. They both blushed at the action, they haven't adjusted yet how their hearts always went wild with each other.  Even a skinship like hand holding never fail to make their stomach filled with butterflies. Every movement of each, they were well aware of it all. They just grow sensitive for each other that just a glance was enough to set their hearts on fire.. Although, at this point they still haven't gotten passed the intimacy of a french kiss and they haven't talked about it either. For now, they just mutually want to make things slow and enjoy every sensation that their growing attachment for each other brings.

"You look so beautiful." Wendy complimented and gazed at her with eyes full of admiration. Irene was elated, she really thought through which outfit she'll wear the night before. After all, she wanted to impress Wendy and she did. 

"Thank you." 

"It still feels so unreal that I'm dating you." 

Irene gently caressed Wendy's face and get lost in her loving gaze. "This is real Wendy. It's real that I love you." 

Wendy this time took a peck on Irene's lips and sighed in contentment after. "Thank you for being real." 

Blank Paper [END] | Wenrene

 

Part 2/2

"Unnie, let's eat outside for dinner? Mom and dad won't be home 'til late at night so it'll be convenient for us to just dine out." Yeri said walking home after school. Seungwan was a batch higher than Yeri but they often meet together with Joohyun every after school to have some fun and go home together, but lately, this routine drastically changed. 

Joohyun already flew to U.S., but even a week before it, the three of them never got to meet. At first, Yeri thought it was all because Joohyun was busy since her flight was just a week away, but Seungwan not talking about Joohyun in a day nor even look for her were enough clues to conclude that something had happened between the two.

Yeri met Joohyun to bid farewell at the airport, that was their first and last meeting since the two became distant to each other. Seungwan didn't came and Joohyun never said a word about it which was really odd. If Yeri would describe the two how often they speak about each other then it will be like, Seungwan speaks about Joohyun at least once a day and Joohyun speaks only Seungwan in a day. That was their usual get up which is why it's so deafening to hear only silence from them. She would like to press on Joohyun but decided not to in the end judging how she looked like she's on the verge of breaking down. 

Seungwan's bubbly personality that lights up everything everywhere she goes vanished too leaving no traces at all. After school, she always wanted to go home, lock herself in the bedroom and only get out when it's time to eat and go to school. Joohyun and Seungwan were classmates, she cannot imagine how the two were inside their class at all. She's used to their image of sweet, always having fun and are  intimately close with each other, so Yeri ponders what really went wrong. 

This new found habit of Seungwan also went extreme when Joohyun started appearing on the news having famous suitors asking her out. Newspapers having her as headline with someone suspected to be her lover kept popping out almost every month. At that point, they no longer knew what was a fact and a rumor considering the amount of news about Joohyun involving with different men in the showbiz world.

Even if Seungwan nor Joohyun didn't talk about it to her, Yeri knew how much the two liked each other. The feeling they have for each other was mutual, she could bet anything on it, and so even if they were miles apart and having misunderstandings, their feelings would still conquer all. That was what Yeri believed in, but as time goes by, Yeri was no longer sure about it anymore because all she ever saw was Joohyun having the time of her life in the U.S. while Seungwan barely lives without her here.

She had witnessed how Seungwan tried to hold onto her still, waited for her to be contacted, but ended up being devastated. Yeri prayed that Joohyun would finally remember, to explain or deny the rumors to them, for her Seungwan unnie to be okay in the end but there were no signs of Joohyun in their lives anymore. All they see and hear from her were about upcoming movies and numerous dating scandals. At that point, the Joohyun they knew, who grew up with them, was only a part of their past.

"I'll just cook for us both."

"Unnie, you rarely talk anymore. Do you want me to die out of boredom?" Yeri joked but she didn't expect Seungwan to get serious with it.

"Then, here." Seungwan stopped walking and turned to Yeri. She reached out for some money on her pocket and gave it to the latter. "This money should be enough for you to eat alone, right? Or has your appetite grew bigger already?" 

Seungwan smiled nicely at her. The smile was contradicting to what her eyes were wearing and it tore Yeri apart. This wasn't her unnie, it angers her that someone made her like this, a shell without soul in it. Why does Seungwan still hold onto Joohyun after so long like this? It's been 4 years already and they're soon to graduate college too? Why was she not moving on without her and only choose to hurt herself by waiting for someone they aren't sure if will come back?! 

Out of frustrations, she swung her hand tapping away the money that Seungwan was offering. Seungwan was surprised by the sudden outburst and it made Yeri regret her action right away. 

"If you don't want to eat outside, then I won't either." Yeri said as she refrain herself from expressing her anger to her. In the end, she didn't want to make her unnie sadder than she already was. If there's someone she has to vent out her anger to, then that should be at Joohyun. She hated her so much that she wanted to inflict the same pain Joohyun made her sister to suffer. Her tears were already edging her eyes so she immediately walked passed Seungwan. Her unnie didn't asked on what just happened and only followed her later on. Yeri knew that her unnie had the idea why but she chose not to talk about it to do not strain their sisterhood over an unrequitted love.

Yeri hated Joohyun so much since then, but after a few days from her outburst, she started seeing Seungwan having progress with her life. She started going out, meet new people, watch less of TV, listen less to radio and read less of newspapers. She was literally taking a distance from Joohyun's world and Yeri was so thankful for it. 

Over the years, her unnie regained herself. The energetic and confident self that shines on everyone around her. Giving the happy vibe like she used to before. Yeri was the happiest for this progress but then Seungwan talked to her one day and asked for a favor that made her admire her unnie even more. Yeri was moved to tears after hearing out her unnie the entire conversation.

"Yeri, I'm all okay now. So, can I ask you not to hate Joohyun anymore?" 

"She's an unnie you liked so much before. I don't want you to change that just because you saw me suffer. Your story with her is different from my story with her."

"You have suffered because I wasn't being myself, so it was my fault as your sister and not hers to you." 

"As your sister, I've changed my ways and came back to my old self now, Yeri. By now I wouldn't embarrass nor hurt you for seeing a messed up unnie anymore." 

Seungwan smiled at her like the old times, and it made Yeri crumble down and embraced her unnie that she missed so much. "I promise and I'm sorry, unnie! But I want you to know that you've never embarrassed me one bit! You're the best sister I could ever ask for, Seungwan unnie!" 

Blank Paper | Wenrene

Part 1/2

Irene finally came back in South Korea after 10 years. She never thought that she will be able to leave her homeland for this long, but she did. If it weren't beause of acting projects offered to her consecutively in Hollywood, she wouldn't dare to step outside South Korea other than short vacations. But because it was her dream to act and touch many people's heart with her works, she prioritized her career when an opportunity opened to her. Who wouldn't want to grab a one in a million chance like going to the Hollywood and act for big projects? This could possibly the best option there is in order for her to achieve the goal she has set for her acting career. 

It felt like she's in cloud 9 when she was able to live her dream. Seeing many people react positively to her movies in different nations was the best feeling she could ever ask for as an actress. In those whole 10 years, she managed to create a name for herself not just in South Korea and in the U.S. but all over the world. She's the only South Korean actress that portrayed leading roles in many blockbuster films in Hollywood anyways. She has become one of the A-listed actresses of this generation.

Joohyun started acting when she was in highschool. She was only 18 when she got offered to fly all over to Hollywood and act too. Everything was hard at first, her English ability was nowhere comprehensible back then so she had to double her hard work, study in the evening and act in the day. Her mind and body suffered from lack of rest that she got hospitalized several times, but Joohyun never gave up. 

She hold onto her dream and the thought that everything she had left in South Korea will be for nothing if she'll stop there and then. What will be the best excuse she could say to those people who believed in her if she went home without a progress? To those people she had painfully given up just for her failed dream? There will be none and she wouldn't dare to disappoint all of them.

"Ms. Bae, we're here." Joohyun's thoughts were halted when their car got to the destination she had asked to go. It's the first time she had landed in South Korea after 10 years and this was the very first place that she wanted to see. The most important one. 

"Do you want to buy some cake, Ms. Bae?" The chauffeur asked. 

Joohyun did not respond. Her mind automatically reactivated all the memories she had treasured in the depths of her heart. Gazing through her window, that Son Pastry Shop made her memories came back so vividly like it's set before her eyes. 

"Joohyun! This is where I was born so this is where I will die!" A girl with fair skin and short length hair said so confidently with a cheeky smile on her face. 

"This isn't really where you're born exactly, is it Seungwan? A pastry shop, really?" Joohyun teased and dismissed her friend's dramatic lines. 

"Aish! You never play along with me." Seungwan pouted and turned her back only to get a chuckle and a pinch on her cheek from behind.

"What's up with the silly line, anyway? Have you listened to a new song again or a movie maybe?" She said while she untangled Seungwan's crossed arms and turn her to look at her. 

"Didn't you hear what the humanities teacher said earlier in class before he left? He wants us to write an essay about what we wanted to be in the future." 

"And you don't know what it is so you acted like that just now."

Seungwan twitched, she got read again by Joohyun. What's new? 

"O-of course not! It's the truth! I'll stay rooted here. I'm not sure what the future holds for us but if you want to look for me, then just come here, okay?" 

Joohyun scoffed at her remarks. There goes Seungwan again with her giant words to aid from being caught wide open. She just shrugged it off, again.

"Fine, fine. I'll just ignore the fact that you wear your heart on your sleeves all the time." 

"I'm telling the truth, though!" 

"So you want to become a baker?" Joohyun played along. 

"Mmm... not really."

Joohyun raised an eyebrow. "You're just gonna pig out here then?" 

"What?!" 

Joohyun laughed at the big reaction she's getting. Seungwan really is easy to tease. 

"You didn't answer me though." She pouted. 

"Hmm?" 

"I said.. look for me here whenever you want to see me." She brightfully grinned that Irene thought it was the silliest but the cutest smile she had seen in her life yet. 

"It's not like we're going to get separated in the future seeing you stuck with me all the time." Joohyun laughed it off but when she saw Seungwan's face turned serious, she faked coughing and agreed to it. 

"Okay. I'll look for you here, but if you aren't here when I look for you then I'm really going to knock you out!"  

Seungwan immediately regained her bright self and smiled excitedly at Joohyun's response. Looking at it, it never failed to make her heart flutter. 

"Ms. Bae?" The chauffeur inquired when Joohyun hurriedly opened her door and get out of the car. 

"I'm just gonna greet someone in that shop. Wait for me here, it won't be long." 

"I'll accompany you then, Ms." He tried to stop her.

"No. Just stay here. I'll be okay." 

The chauffeur was hesitant to let go of her master because he was afraid to risk her safety. She's very popular after all and was afraid that she'll get mobbed by her fans. But before he was able to try and stop her again, Joohyun was already out of her seat. 

Joohyun was hopeful to see her again after 10 years and now that she's back there's nothing that could stop her now, right? She had been longing for Seungwan so much that all she could ever think of in that 10 years was only her when she's not working. Her mind was always occupied with only thoughts of her. 

She didn't notice how her feet was speeding up towards the shop, but then another memory came in that made her tracks slow down and finally stopped. 

"I like you Joohyun." 

Joohyun was totally astounded. She had been meaning to confess to Seungwan since they were in highschool but she's so afraid that she'll lose her friendship with her that she ended up backing away. But now that she's soon to leave the country for her dream, she has found the courage to do it finally today. She was so sure that Seungwan would reject her though, that's why she ready herself with it. Her, leaving next week was a great opportunity for her to escape from Seungwan after rejection too. Everything was well planned, all she has to do was to confess and get over this one-sided love so she could fully focus on her dream. That's what she had ironed out in her head.

But she's speechless how this day turned to be out of her plan. Her heart was beating so fast and her brain couldn't function normally when Seungwan confessed. She feels the same as her! But... what should she do?! She has to leave next week and doesn't know when to come back too. 

"Y-you.. you like me?" 

"Uhm.. yeah.. I know it's crazy, right? I didn't mean to fall for you... it just happened." Seungwan was facing the ground while confessing, afraid and shy in front of Joohyun. 

"I'm sorry, Seungwan." No. This isn't what she really wanted to say but it just went out from her. Probably because she already had set her mind on her dream, to go away and focus on her career. She didn't expect Seungwan to reciprocate her feelings for her, so she was sticking only to what she knew and had planned out from the start.

"I knew you'd say that." Seungwan said with a dejected look. 

Wait, no! Seungwan, this isn't how it should be. I like you too, a lot! Those were what Joohyun was thinking about but couldn't say out loud. She hated it, not being able to say anything. Why? Why can't she stop Seungwan from falling apart in front of her with her true feelings? Why can't she bring herself to tell her that she likes her for a long time now too? 

"I'm sorry, too. I know I shouldn't confess now that you're going away, but just so you know I did not confess to stop you or make you feel guilty for turning me down. I just thought that I want to let this feeling out because I don't know when I'll ever have the chance to in the future." Seungwan was trying her hardest not to cry but her tears were already overflowing. The tears were non stop no matter how many times she wiped it out.

This view of Seungwan in front of her hurts Joohyun so much that she felt like she's dying inside. But despite it, she stayed immobile for not knowing what exactly is the right thing to do. She wanted Seungwan but it fears her that all the plans and goals she had set her mind for her dream will all crumble down to nothing. She knew that if she chose Seungwan, she won't be able to leave even if her flight was set next week. 

"Why are you looking at me like that? Don't get hurt just because you turned me down. Aish.. that makes me look pitiful." Seungwan tried her best to smile and joke around but the tears just won't stop. 

"Seungwan." 

"Let's try to be friends though. Even if you're already in the U.S., don't forget to contact me, alright? Just forget about this confession of mine and treat it like those silly words I've been blurting out like the usual... but I'll also understand if you no longer want to connect with me either. I really do." 

Seungwan forced yet another smile to lighten up the mood between them. "Yah, Joohyun you still there?" 

"Seungwan, I'm really sorry." 

"Don't feel guilty about it. I just need to let it out, really. At least, I can fully move on now. Now that you wasted your chance with me." Seungwan laughed half hearted. She didn't want Joohyun to feel bad about her rejection.

Joohyun just played along, it's better this way for now. So they hugged and bid farewell, Seungwan wishing her to take care always.

Joohyun thought that she could think about the situation later, she still have time before her flight next week, right? But then she didn't expect, that it'll become their last conversation for the whole span of 10 years.

How did it went like that? Seungwan never left her mind but she couldn't bring to call or message her even if she wanted to. She thought that it'll be selfish and cruel of her if she contact her again knowing that it was her fault why they've become distant like this. The devastating look that Seungwan was sporting back then when she got rejected was haunting Joohyun even in her sleep and she cried after waking up to it. 

In that whole 10 years she was away from Seungwan, she was living in full regret and fear. She regretted that she didn't chose her when she finally realized that all her heart ever wanted was to love and to be loved by her. She fears that, Seungwan might have moved on now when she's stuck in the same love she has for her up until now. Moving on? Joohyun didn't know how to and she didn't know if she'll ever learn to.

"Is everything okay, Miss?" A voice called her out from her back. She noticed now that she had stopped exactly by the door of the pastry shop and completely hinders possible customers.

"Oh. I'm sorry." Joohyun moved slightly to the side but remained facing the ground in order to stay low key. 

"Wait.. is that you, Joohyun unnie?!" 

Joohyun flinched. She got discovered, did she? But wait, her voice sounded so familar so she looked at her face. 

"Yeri!" She excitedly claimed and both of them were jumping happily. It has been 10 years since they have seen each other anyway. 

"I knew it! Since when did the famous Bae Joohyun came back?!" Yeri asked when they were already seated inside the Son's shop. They talked in one of the private area of the place but still has great view of the outside. The shop's cozy interiors and the smell of the cakes and coffee that she grew accustomed before made Joohyun finally felt at home. 

"What are you talking about. It's just me. And.. I only got back today." She smiled at her which gained a teasing one from the other.

"Oh-ho! Excited to see Seungwan unnie?" 

Joohyun's heart skipped a beat. Is she allowed to say what's really inside her heart with Seungwan's little sister, Yeri? Is it okay to ask her about Seungwan too? But.. is she ready to find out details about her? What if... just what if... Seungwan already has someon--

"Why didn't you contact her though." Yeri said that stabbed Joohyun painfully straight to her heart.

She really wanted to contact her, God knows how much she wanted to. She thought, she'll only talk to Seungwan if ever she wanted to reconnect with her so she waited days, weeks, months and several years... but there was no signs of Seungwan. It only meant one thing to her, Seungwan didn't want her back in her life anymore. Why would she anyway? Just because she said they should remain friends after the rejection doesn't mean it was what she really felt. She broke her heart into a million pieces.

"It's okay. Past is past. I think both of you have moved on anyways." Yeri continued after Joohyun's long silence. "You with your career and I bet you've dated bunch of celebrities! So.. who did you date? Uh.. Did you happen to meet to Harry Styles or even Zayn Malik? OMG! Those two are blazing H.O.T!" 

Joohyun only looked at her amused. She get it that those two were immensely popular but they were both singers and she was too focused with acting to even look at them. Has she dated in that span of 10 years? Yeri might have seen so many rumors circulating her love life in the news, but no, she didn't date. There were many people including celebrities who tried to break in to her heart but Seungwan's occupying it fully that there's just no space for anyone else at all. 

"I don't date there. I already have someone." Joohyun claimed but was it okay to say such a thing? Who was she claiming? Seungwan? She must have been kidding!

"That's a scoop! Who on earth would that be?! That person is in Korea?! Wow, daebak!" Yeri displayed her amazed looks and clapped slowly upon hearing Joohyun's honest reply.

"No. You don't have to answer unnie." Yeri stopped her with a hand even though Joohyun was nowhere near saying anything at all. "I'm just glad that you'll be able to meet that person again. I'm glad both of you and Seungwan unnie are now happy with your respective love life."

Joohyun's chest tightened. Seungwan has someone?

Tears were already edging her eyes but she was trying to hold back. This is the thing that she feared so much that her heart couldn't take at all. She's so stupid to hold on to her for that long years without communication, who on earth would think that Seungwan would still feel the same? It was her fault in the first place... that she's hurting this much now. 

"Seungwan unnie's totally in love. I could say what they have is really true love. I admire Seungwan and her lover, they've been so strong through it all."

Why is she even listening to Yeri? Why isn't she leaving yet? Does she really want to torture herself?

"Talk about Seungwan more, and her lover" Joohyun requested with a painful smile that Yeri started to worry. 

"Unnie, are you alright?" She held her hand.

The tears already fell from Joohyun's eyes, but she was still forcing a smile. This must have been what Seungwan had felt when she tried to act that everything was okay in front of her. This must have been her karma with all the pain she had inflicted to her even if she didn't really wanted to. 

"Yeri. Talk more about Seungwan." Joohyun managed to say before she completely broken down. She covered her face with both of her hands, she wanted the tears to stop, but she had held it in for so long that she couldn't control now that it pours.

"Why are you making a customer cry, Yeri?" 

The voice that Joohyun haven't heard in a long time made her stop crying. No, it felt like everything else stopped. Even if she didn't turn around, she knew very well the owner of that voice because it's the same voice that spoke to her the sweetest and the kindest words. The voice that made her knees weak, the voice that filled her stomach with butterflies, the voice that she missed so much, it's the voice that belongs to the one that she truly love. Seungwan. 

a/n: 

I will cut this story into two parts. I'll see you on the next update. :)