"You look terrible, Seungwan. You should've not reported to work today." Seulgi, Seungwan's best friend and colleague said as she observes her friend spacing out in front of her computer. "I don't think you'll finish anything just by staring at your screen." She added and took Seungwan's pile of documents and started typing it on her own computer.
The fast tapping sounds of the keyboards finally got through Seungwan's senses, her friend Seulgi has once again became a keyboard warrior saving her from a piled up work. They both work as chief editors in a small publishing company and since both of them don't have enough people under them, some raw works from their bosses were dropped directly on their table and never left. Seungwan and Seulgi were tired of the lack of support but they still endure it because they don't want to suffocate their people with more tasks as they already have more than enough on their plate.
To work on the extra loads equally were both agreed and planned by Seungwan and Seulgi, however, it wasn't the case at all for the past few days, weeks, months and a year. Seulgi was the only one doing most of the work as Seungwan's mind flies somewhere else. Seungwan felt bad about it and told Seulgi that she'll just resign and take some time off but the latter strongly disagreed with her decision and made her stay by her side in the end. Seulgi was very adamant that she'll help out no matter what and that Seungwan just have to continue doing work on her own pace and she'll do the rest for her. Seungwan was trying, for Seulgi, she was trying to function normally because she didn't want to see her cry immensely for her just like before. So she stayed, for Seulgi, her best friend who cares the most about her today.
"Stop staring at me Seungwan. I'd rather want you to stare at your own computer screen than stare at me typing like a mad woman here."
"When did you grow eyes on the side?" Seungwan joked but she's honestly always moved by Seulgi's sacrifices for her. Sometimes, she asks herself what she did in her past life to deserve a friend like Seulgi in this lifetime. They just understood each other deeply, how they were wired differently. They know each other like they were a part of each other's soul, an important piece that completes their whole being.
"I know I've said this several times already, Seulgi, but I'm sorry."
Seulgi, as she had always done before whenever Seungwan's feeling less, stopped whatever she was doing and looked at her friend. "I told you several times too, that if I feel burdened I will inform you but I really don't. You just have to accept that fact because that's what friends are for. If you really feel bad about me helping you then return this favor by you just breathing each day, that's already enough for me."
Seungwan's eyes starts to moisten as Seulgi gazes at her like she's looking at a flower that blooms not in the season of spring but of winter. To Seulgi, Seungwan is a miracle and this feeling is mutual between them.
"I've said this multiple times to you too, it's because it's you that I don't feel burdened at all."
The best friends looked at each other sincerely in silence. They have exchanged words of encouragement and love to each other that never fails to send warmth to their hearts, and it never failed to crack a smile on their faces too because after feeling the warmth of their words and gazes the chills of embarrassment also comes next with it. They just couldn't stand being too cheesy for long.
"Aish! You're doing this on purpose, making me tell those cringeworthy words to you." Seulgi said with face flushed as she rubs her arms with both of her hands to get rid of the chills that her cheesiness gave.
Seungwan started doing the same and they both laughed at each other.
"I'll be leaving." Seungwan said and Seulgi's smile got wiped away instantly on her face. They were sinking back to the seriousness of the situation. Even if Seulgi already knew that it was coming, she refuses to believe that she has to let go of her best friend to find herself and face the battle that only her could solve.
"You'll call me, right?"
"Of course."
"Don't you want me to come with you?"
Seungwan smiled. "I think I have to do this on my own."
Seulgi sighed but she understood where Seungwan was coming from. "I'll wait for your comeback then. If something goes wrong along the way, you have to call me, okay?" She demanded instead of a request.
"Thanks, Seulgi-ah. Really, thank you."
It's been a year, ever since Seungwan fought for her life but quickly regretted as she was welcomed with only emptiness, exactly like those plain white walls that surrounded her when she woke up on a hospital bed. Since then, Seulgi watched how Seungwan survived each day but actually never lived.
Picking up her things at home after work, she has begun her journey in facing what she fears. A risky move without a plan nor a map to direct her where she's supposed to go. Opening the side window of the driver's seat, Seungwan became one with the wind that a spring night brings. She let her worries and fear of the unknown fly by with the wind and focuses on the most important thing which was the present.
Seungwan continued on with her journey. She preferred to travel the roads at night because this way, she could fully relate to the emptiness that the darkness brings, it defines what she truly feels. She made sure she drives in silence too, just the sound of the car's engine and her breathing were the ones accompanying her through the night.
The road, the landscapes, the grey walls of the tunnels and the towering trees after it...all the memories they bring will all stay hidden and be left in the dark.
